


The First and Last Time You'll Get Close to Smut in This

by keepquietplease



Series: Sanders Sides First And Last Thing AU [6]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Bad Smut, Cum Eating, Finger Sucking, Gore, Gunplay, Hand Jobs, Humiliation, Humiliation kink, I guess this is smut, I had to do research for this and I hated it, I hate that, I'll name them as I go, Kinks Mentioned, Multi, Oral Fixation, Overstimulation, Sex Toys Mentioned, Subspace, Swordplay, This is getting deleted at some point, bodily functions mentioned, but smut nonetheless, gore mentioned, murder mentioned, non-traditional sex toys, not enough to be under graphic violence tag, piss kink mentioned but immediately told no, rolling pins, so many kinks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-15
Updated: 2020-09-15
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:47:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26485144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/keepquietplease/pseuds/keepquietplease
Summary: A week until the wedding, and Patton wants to bring back the stories Virgil wrote.  Here we take a break from your gore and blood to see smut that will be deleted at some point.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Deceit | Janus Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Everyone, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Series: Sanders Sides First And Last Thing AU [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1913083
Comments: 8
Kudos: 100





	The First and Last Time You'll Get Close to Smut in This

**Author's Note:**

> Have a fun break from murder as Virgil slowly wants to die.  
> Also I had to read so many fucking articles to try to understand how this shit worked because my sensory thing makes it impossible for me to tell you what things actually feel like.  
> Please request something (murder AU or not) so I don't have to write this garbage again.

It was a week before the wedding. Virgil wanted to sit with his crows for a bit and relax. Planning was getting stressful. He sometimes used his birds as guides. They helped him keep on a path when he forgot his white cane. He didn't today, but his crows still led him to their general nesting area to sit and enjoy some time together. Most of them would be staying in the winter, but a few were saying goodbye as they migrated. He'd miss them, but they'd be back. They led him back home, cawing once he was safely returned. Virgil gave each of them a treat--some melted human fat--before heading inside. He wasn't surprised when he heard chatter. Patton was using everyone to help prepare. Their wedding was odd. None of the traditional wedding shit. Vows were stupid when they knew they'd be together forever, and no long sermon would please them. They just wanted to find the perfect victim for the ceremony. 

"Virgil! Just in time! Sit down." Patton said, dragging him to the couch. "So, guess what I finished reading."

"I'm leaving." Virgil immediately stood up, but he was grabbed and restrained by the twins. "This is bullying."

"So we just have to test some of your writing out on you. We have a chalkboard with all the stuff you wrote about."

"This is the worst thing that's ever happened to me."

"Now, the first thing on the list is a gun kink. Logan said it was in one of the stories that didn't include us. We're going to have you suck on a gun, alright?"

Virgil felt the muzzle of a gun press against his lips. He turned his head. "Is it empty?"

He heard clicking, bullets being removed, and then another click. Then his mouth was held open by Remus as someone put it in his mouth.

"Now, how much do you like that? Actually, suck on it for us. Give us a little show."

Virgil tried to give a response, but whoever was holding it was moving it now. He felt himself gag slightly when the whole barrel went in. They moved it in and out of his mouth until Virgil started doing it on his own. It was easy to forget he was being watched. He swirled his tongue around it, playing delicately with it. Then the thrusting became harder, and yeah, that seemed about right for what he wrote. He grabbed Roman's hand, closing his eyes. Being face fucked with a gun wasn't great, but it wasn't the worst experience he had. The gun was pulled out from his mouth, letting a small string of saliva connect them.

"How was that?"

"A six out of ten. Didn't appreciate the metallic taste, and it was cold. You know what I really don't like? Being held down and having a fucking gun shoved in my mouth. Having to remind you to take the bullets out. One hundred percent would've shot myself by accident if I was holding it. There's a thing you can push, and I like pushing things when I'm stressed. Can I be let go now?"

"You rated it high." Logan mumbled. He was in front of Virgil, meaning he was operating the gun.

"Why do you own a gun, Logan?"

"Emergencies. Like if my boyfriend gets kidnapped."

"Touché. Can I please leave?"

"The fun just started. Stay awhile." Janus said, flipping through pages. "I printed your stories out so we could review them as we go."

"Can we just agree I was dumb? I haven't written any stories for years."

"You're really into us threatening you."

"That's what I said!" Patton said with exasperation. 

"I'm not! I thought I was, but I'm not! I mean, I kind of am. I don't know. I don't want you to kill me, but I like when Patton tells me I have to do something or else. I hate this. I hate bully Virgil day."

"Swordplay? You had that one with--"

"We did that." Roman and Virgil said at the same time. Virgil cleared his throat.

"It was highly uncomfortable having a sword hilt inside of me. Roman had fun. It's a five out of ten. I'd do it again, but I don't love it. Can I just tell you what I like? I know what I like."

"Then we can't test it on you." Roman whispered, squeezing his hand. "How about licking a sword? We didn't try that."

"I would gladly clean your weapons with my mouth. I like that. I don't like when they're forced into my mouth, but I'll polish anything with my tongue."

Roman held up his sword, smiling. "Clean it."

"Right now?"

"Yes."

Virgil grumbled, pulling his hand away and taking the sword. It was recently cleaned by him, so Virgil didn't have to worry about dust, but he licked it gently. He was careful not to cut his tongue as he kept going. He liked this more than the gun, breathing out a small 'ten' as he kept licking it. He sucked the tip of the blade, motioning for Patton to keep going as he worked. Roman was practically vibrating with excitement watching, telling him what spots were still dirty. Patton had to continue, knowing that wasn't stopping any time soon.

"Alright. Edging?"

Virgil paused his 'cleaning' to look up. "No. I fucking hate that. I get really anxious, and my senses flare up, and all I want to do is cry. I tried it with my one ex, and it wasn't fun. We broke up after that. I never want to try that again."

"Alright, crossing that off. Keep cleaning Roman's sword. You obviously have an oral fixation." Patton said as Virgil turned red. "That's fine. I'm going to check that. You didn't put that in your stories."

"Because I don't need people to know I like sucking and licking things." 

Roman gently pushed his face back to the sword, holding him there until he began licking it again. "This is fun. I think we should just make Virgil clean all our weapons like this from now on. Chained up. I want him with a chain around his neck, cleaning our weapons with his tongue until he can't think. Do we need a boyfriend who can think? Can't we just have this?"

Virgil let out a soft moan at that.

"He has a thing for being used, I guess." Logan said, moving away to help Patton write it down. "And being chained to something."

"That one was conditioning. I liked when Patton tied me to the pole in the basement--" 

Roman pushed his head back to the sword. "I have more swords at home. If you're careful, Remus' morning star needs to be cleaned. He hasn't used it for a bit. Just answer yes or no now. Focus on your task."

"How about sensory deprivation? Do we like that?"

Virgil nodded, working on the hilt. He was a bit embarrassed, squirming. He pulled back a bit, taking in air. "I like being humiliated. Just found that out. Actually, maybe I like being watched. No, it's both. It's definitely both."

He heard writing as he went back to sucking on the leather grip. He swirled his tongue around it, pulling back again.

"Cleaned."

Roman took it back, shoving three of his fingers in Virgil's mouth. "I didn't bring my other swords. He'll deal with this. Suck, love. You'll have more to clean. Patton probably has some weapons for you."

"Not yet, but I will. What if we put an ear plug in your ear? Think it would help?"

Virgil gave a muffled yes, tearing up. Roman was running his fingers over his teeth, taking control. 

"Overstimulation?"

"Never tried it." Virgil mumbled, his breath hitching when a fourth finger was added. He could fit a fist in his mouth if he tried, but Roman was taking his sweet time. He was drifting now. He felt his body go lax as they continued. Patton's voice got muffled. Virgil was just focused on the fingers in his mouth, sucking lightly. He let out a small whine when the fingers were pulled out, hearing someone whisper he needed to come back. Virgil focused on his breathing, leaning back slightly until he could hear everyone clearly again. "Okay, I'm good. Sorry."

"Subspace feels good?"

"So good."

"You can go back after we finish, okay? If you feel yourself going there, we'll have to bring you back. I don't know if that feels like edging--"

"We'll find out, I guess." 

"We know you get turned on when we murder people. That's on the list of good kinks. Mirror sex?"

"I'm blind. I can only see the difference in shades."

"Yep, okay. Dirty talk?"

"I would gladly listen to explicit ways you're all going to use me before it happens."

"Foot fetish?"

"Okay, listen. I don't find feet sexy. I don't find most body parts sexy, but I know you like me worshipping you, so I'll do it. I don't get off on that. I get off on you telling me to treat you like a god and holding me in place."

"You don't have a pain kink. We found that out quickly." Remus said, patting his leg. "Flogging is off the table, right?"

"Yes."

"Do you like begging?"

"I mean, I'll do it. It really depends on what I'm begging for. Am I begging to be touched? Am I begging to be able to touch you?"

"Alright, that's in the maybe category."

"Collars?" Roman asked.

"It's clothing. I don't see the appeal."

"Collar that says you belong to us."

"Okay, I see the appeal. Also, degradation would be nice. Kind of goes with threatening, but I like when I'm told I'm worthless and only good for what I'm doing. Also being ordered around. I like being told what to do. I know I said that earlier, but I really like that." Virgil licked his lips. 

"Want my fingers again?" Roman asked.

"Yes please."

Roman pushed two in this time, hoping it wouldn't drive Virgil over. He let him do the work, smiling as he moved his hand gently. "How do you feel about being filmed? Would you like that?"

Virgil gave a thumbs up, trying to get a third finger. He didn't get it, instead having the two fingers pull back a little as punishment.

"I don't think we've ever tried sex toys on you. I'd personally love to see you subdued with sex toys. A vibrator or two maybe? One for your mouth and the other for your ass." Janus said, clicking a pen.

Virgil got off the fingers, kissing the knuckles. "I will literally suck anything put in front of me. Don't test me."

"No, I think I will test you. I'm going to see how long until you go into subspace. Wait for a second." Janus got up, walking to the kitchen. He came back, tapping his cheek. Virgil opened his mouth, immediately recognizing Janus put a rolling pin in his mouth. It had a rubber covering, which was great because he didn't feel like getting splinters on his tongue. He choked a bit until he got the majority of it in his mouth. Janus patted his head. "I'm giving Roman control of moving it in and out of your mouth. Let's see how long you last with that."

Virgil wanted to retort, but he was starting to drift. He focused the sound of Janus laughing as Roman pushed it a bit forward. He heard Patton tell him to give a thumbs up or thumbs down for the remaining questions. If he didn't know, he should tap his leg twice. Virgil nodded, gripping his leg.

"Massages?"

Thumbs down.

"I now know you like cleaning our weapons, but do you get turned on from our weapons."

Two taps to his leg. Roman pushed it further into his mouth, making Virgil whimper. He had to focus. He wasn't going to let Janus win this. 

"Oh, he's slipping." Remus said. "Look at his face. I'm betting he lasts another five minutes."

"Make it seven. Anyone else want to bet?" Logan asked, writing something else on the chalkboard. The numbers everyone gave didn't go above eight minutes, meaning Virgil now couldn't drop until he reached that mark. He wasn't losing this, dammit.

"Praise kink?"

Another two taps to his legs as he felt a hand on his crotch. He felt pressure rather quickly. He tried to complain, but he couldn't get anything out.

"If this gets too much, tap your leg five times, okay?" Patton now had a hand on his cheek, watching as Virgil tried to swallow around the pin. "There's no shame in stopping."

Virgil glared. Now it was personal. He tried to go further on the pin, lifting his hips slightly. Bad idea because he liked that, but he stayed alert.

"Oh, we're buying you a sex toy you can suck on. Maybe a gag with a dildo attached to it so you have to suck on it. You'd like that?"

Virgil nodded weakly, blinking. He may lose this. The hand that was on him slowly undid his jeans, slipping into his boxers and beginning to pump slowly. Virgil let out a small groan, leaning his head back.

"Well, a minute passed. Patton's out. Tell him about killing. It'll make him go faster." Logan stated, clicking his tongue. The closeness indicted that Logan was jacking him off, slowly speeding up his hand. 

Virgil gave a weak protest, lost when Roman started moving the rolling pin again.

"How about being unable to move?"

Virgil gave a thumbs down, taking a gulp of air when the pin was out of his mouth. "That makes me feel safer. Less turned on."

He wasn't lying. The idea of him being sick and unable to move made him more alert again. That was helpful. Roman put the pin back in his mouth, faster now. He was matching Logan's pace, making Virgil shudder. There was a click. He could make out the light of the flash. Someone took a picture.

"What about being put in a cage."

Two taps to his leg.

"Piss?"

Virgil felt himself lose any lust he had, cringing. He gave two thumbs down at that. He managed to get out an 'ew' from behind the rolling pin. Logan's grip tightened firmly around him, trying to get him hard again. It was working, mostly because he didn't want to think about bodily functions. It still took a bit for him to even be close to dropping.

"How do you feel about drinking blood during sex?"

A thumbs up.

"Four minutes now. Roman's out. Should we stop if you cum? We could try overstimulation today."

Virgil tapped twice, shaking slightly.

"If you don't want to try it, tell us." Roman said, pulling the rolling pin out of his mouth.

Remus wiped his cheek. Virgil didn't even register he was crying. He wouldn't let them know that he was drifting. He had to do this.

"I don't know? I-I don't want to lose this challenge. Keep g-going."

Logan paused the timer, pulling his hand out. "Virgil, the challenge isn't important."

"I'll tell you if I need to stop. I promise I'll tell you. Please."

"And begging is a yes for me." Patton said as Logan started the timer.

The hand went back, and Roman put the rolling pin back in his mouth. Virgil moaned, eyes fluttering shut.

"Groping?"

Thumbs up.

"Now answer honestly. In all your old stories, you were a top. Would you ever want to do that?"

Thumbs down right away. The pin made it to the back of his throat, causing him to twitch.

"Oh thank god. I think Remus is the only one who'd like that, but he also doesn't need to have that. What do you think about cock warming."

Virgil pointed to the rolling pin in his mouth.

"I know, but this is difference than one of us moving it inside of you. You'd just sit or lay there, keeping us in your mouth."

Virgil gave two thumbs up, moving his hips in Logan's hand. He was getting close. He usually lasted longer, but it had been awhile since they did anything. Wedding planning was taking up his time. Plus getting sick at the beginning of the month on purpose? He and Patton didn't have the time to be intimate with one another.

"Maybe we could have you on your knees after you drop? Would you want that at all?"

He whined, the noise echoing from around the pin. A thumbs up. 

"Just sitting on your knees, around Patton?" Remus asked, biting his ear gently. "Listening to us continue discussing what kinks you might have? You can tap Patton's leg to say yes or no. I think it'd be nice to see you fucked out, unable to think. Just soft suckling as you listened. Maybe we can pass you around a bit. Make you forget your name."

This was unfair, Virgil decided. This was five on one. There wasn't really any shame if he just let go because he was doomed to drop. It'd be fine. He debated giving up. Another picture was taken. He probably looked fucked. The only thing that kept him grounded was the fact Logan said they passed five minutes and thirty seconds. Remus was out. Just Logan and Janus now. Seven and eight minutes respectively. He was almost there. He could probably last ten minutes. He didn't have to make it to then. That was just his personal goal.

He let out a small groan as he came, moving with Logan's hand until he stopped. He started squirming as they kept going. He pulled at his pants, not wanting to be in his dirty boxers anymore. Remus took them off, kissing his knee softly.

"How you feeling? Can we continue?"

Virgil nodded, blinking rapidly. Everything was dialed up to eleven now. It hurt a bit, but not enough to make him want it to stop.

"Virgil, very important question." Logan lifted his hand. "How do you feel about eating your own cum."

Virgil's hand started twitching. He didn't know. He had no idea how he felt about that. He gave a thumbs up, not meaning it at all. If he did the two taps, they'd stop the timer again to talk. He wanted to drop already. He watched as Logan stopped the timer again, making Virgil tear up, before covering the rolling pin in his cum. Roman, as carefully as he could, put it in his mouth again once the timer began. Another picture was taken. It tasted awful, but Virgil just scrunched his nose. The taste kept him grounded. Only a few minutes left. Logan got back to work as Patton asked more questions.

"Suspension. How about that."

Two taps, a pause, thumbs down. He didn't want to be up in the air.

"How do you like cum eating now?"

Virgil did two taps again.

"Okay pause the--"

Virgil quickly switched it to a thumbs up, whining again.

"Are you being honest."

Thumbs up. He was getting hard again.

"Asphyxiation?"

Two taps.

"I'm out. That leaves Janus. One minute left." Logan quickened his pace. 

"Just in general, would you say you like giving oral more or receiving anal?"

Virgil help up one finger, licking the pin clean. He was counting in his head. Fifty seconds left.

"And you still want our night to just be soft sex?"

A thumbs up.

"Alright, let's see. I guess competition is up there."

Virgil tapped his leg twice, not sure if he'd ever want to do this much again. Maybe some day, but no time soon.

"I'm surprised. Alrighty!" Patton paused for a bit, trying to think of more kinks. "Food stuff? Like stuffing yourself until it hurts?"

Thumbs down.

"Having a partner eat food off of you?"

Two taps. Twenty seconds left.

"How do you feel receiving oral."

Thumbs up.

"Rimming."

Two taps.

"You're doing a good job. The rolling pin is almost clean."

Virgil was definitely crying now.

"Virgil, you can tap out." Patton's voice was soft now. There was no challenging demeanor like there was before. "It's okay--"

Thumbs down. Ten seconds left. He could make it.

"How's over stimulation feeling?"

He tapped twice, his whole body twitching. Seven seconds.

"Honey, we should stop if it feels bad. You don't have to prove yourself. That's twice for things we're doing to you at the moment."

Two seconds. He counted slowly.

"You beat eight minutes. You can drop now." Logan said, letting go. Virgil let out a choked sob, trying to cum. Logan carefully took him, pumping again. The rolling pin was pulled out his mouth, letting Virgil gasp and moan freely. "That's good. You can let go."

Virgil shook his head. He could make it to ten minutes. He wanted them to be impressed. It was easier without something in his mouth. 

"Honey--"

Virgil came again, trembling. Another picture was taken. Logan let him ride through it before letting go. He kissed Virgil's hand. "We have to clean you up."

He nodded. Remus was kissing his ear again. After maybe ten seconds he felt a wet washcloth on him, making him curse. 

"I know it hurts. I'm almost done."

"Not in subspace." Virgil mumbled, biting his hand. 

"Want to be?"

Virgil nodded. Roman put his fingers back at Virgil's mouth, watching as he began to lick them. He took them in slowly. Roman patted his head. "I stand by my point that this should be what Virgil does for the rest of his life. Just please us."

"That's what he does in general." Janus pointed out.

"He has too much free will."

Virgil pulled away from his fingers, nodding.

"See!"

"Roman, he's exhausted." Remus said, frowning. "Wait until he feels awake."

Logan pulled the washcloth away, patting his leg. "Now you can be honest. Overstimulation and cum eating?"

"Painful and gross." Virgil responded, kicking his pants and boxers completely off of his legs. "I need to wash those."

"Why did you let us continue?" Patton kicked the dirty clothes. He stripped Virgil of his shirt, placing them on the ground. "I'll be washing those tonight. Answer me."

"Wanted to win. Plus, the bad taste kept me grounded. I didn't want to tap out. It felt good after awhile. Just felt bad at first."

"If it hurts at all, you call it off!"

Virgil curled up, sucking on his own fingers. Patton grabbed his face, pulling the hand out. 

"Virgil, you need to say stop next time."

"Okay. Can I wash my clothes?"

"I said I would do it. Just put them in the washer for me. Answer truthfully, are you still okay with cock warming tonight?"

"I'm not sure."

"Alright, then we won't do it. Want to get dressed?"

"Yeah." Virgil got up, grabbing his dirty clothes, and went to the bedroom to get dressed. He put his clothes in the washer, heading back to the living room to sit on Patton's lap. Logan bit his jaw, letting him drop. He felt safe and warm, curled up. Patton was talking about something, but Virgil wasn't listening. He closed his eyes and smiled.

One week left.

**Author's Note:**

> ...This will be deleted in a couple years probably. I don't know.  
> And no, this won't be going in my 'sanders sides stories' because this is shameful.
> 
> Author fact: I started getting arm spasms writing this. This fic is cursed.
> 
> Please send requests so I don't do this. Like, this is tame and all, but still.


End file.
